Contractor In Heaven
A contractor dies on a fishing accident on birthday number 40 and is greeted at the Pearly Gates by a brass band.
Saint Peter runs over, shakes hands and says “Congratulations!”
“Congratulations for what?” asks the contractor.
“Congratulations for what?” says Saint Peter. “We are celebrating the fact that you lived to be 160 years old.”
“But that’s not true,” says the consultant. “I only lived to be forty.”
“That’s impossible,” says Saint Peter, “we added up your time sheets.”